It has been 17 years since my father passed away. It was dismal. The August 7th bomb blast on the US Embassy in Nairobi took his life that fateful day. The memories fade and of course the times change but I guess the number 17 has always struck a chord inside me. It frightens me how sometimes. But then again it might have been because I was born on the 17th day of October. Trusting Wikipedia, the number holds many important significances in pure mathematics, as well as in applied sciences, law, music, religion, sports and other cultural phenomena. 17 has a meaning from the Bible too, I found out! It symbolizes "overcoming the enemy" and "complete victory." Now, I don't know if my father might have been a good man for I was too young to know the ways of men then, but he read his Bible. And he taught me how to read mine. And of course there's an energy people walk in that can never be forgotten. See, my mother had found in him a rock, a pillar, an indomitable tower to shelter in. So much until it was no more. It is the thing with fate; you never know when the power will cut. So you keep your candles close, for you may need to light your way through the darkness. That's why cars have headlights to lead them through the woes of the nighttime highways. And you can imagine them go off unannounced in the middle of a journey with a sudden bend right ahead the corner of the slope on the road you were driving on. You hold your breath and expect the worst hoping the driver was ready and is afraid for his life as much. Or endears it so. I am not as good with words as I would love to be, but I'm in love with even the little beautiful words of kindness people have for others. If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say it at all unless it needs to be said. The flowers remind you of our fragile lives and how easy it is to cease to exist. Once unplucked, we wither. Our bodies are drained all life from them. We become no more. Eyes still and body weak. Yet a good man is known by the impact he leaves on other people's hearts and thoughts and possibly actions. Hope. Why are you remorseful for the things you are remorseful for? Because of the attachment, the relationship, the investment, the benefits, the time, the growth, the love. All these things. They mix together sometimes and the larger the disbelief that this could be happening, the more we find ourselves in suffering. It hits close home. People will always be there when you need them and after a tragedy, they stay closer to comfort you. To help you pick up, to remind you that things will get better. Others stay close to see how far you'll go and how much you've been broken. So for those ones, rise and ride above the tides. We started carrying the burden by ourselves after a short time. Nothing was the same. You have to learn to pick up and keep driving even in darkness after you've stopped by the side to check on the lights and to catch your breath. Grateful that at least you survived. Saved to see a new day. People will always be nice but even the nicest people have their limits. So you become considerate. You don't tell everyone your problems because some might delight in your misfortunes. Help will always come if you seek it in the right ways and even if not enough, sometimes all we need is a little push to get the wheels rolling. I'm certain my family and I will forever be indebted to the ones who were there and we pray your blessings multiply a thousandfold. You wish well those who wish you well and you pray for those who wish evil upon you, that they might find the peace lacking in their hearts and anything else they might be looking for. For the ones gone, we miss them dearly. May their souls rest in peace. May they find solace in the fact that today we will choose to do and to be better.
17 sad songs from 17 long years for 17 dark days.
VIXI: I have lived, I have survived.
No comments:
Post a Comment